3x5 Comics

I've begun a new webcomic about philosophy. I hand draw them on 3x5 index cards, and have a generally good time at it. The site is 3x5comics.com. I hope you'll give it a look and subscribe if you like it. Here is the first comic:

Statism Is Dead

Statism Is Dead - Part 3 - The Matrix is a YouTube video by Stefan Molyneux. It's a wonderful short-form view of the idea that governments were not designed for the aid of people, but with human livestock in mind. It's a wonderful way to spend 16 minutes, and is his most popular video to date:

The Trial and Death of Socrates

This YouTube video series by the very living, very breathing philosopher Stefan Molyneux is about some long-dead arguments by a long-dead man whose ghost haunts us to this day. I recommend watching the whole set if you can. Videos 2, 3, and 4 are a dramatic presentation of Plato's Apology, with some limited interpretation. The rest contain some wonderful extrapolation of what it all means, and how dangerous the vengance of philosophers has been to humanity for thousands of years.

These are totally wonderful in so many ways. I want to share them with everybody who has even a passing interest in philosophy, history, literature, or psychology. Code for the YouTube embeddings lazily and lovingly stolen from the Lost Liberty Cafe, a wonderful resource on human freedom.

Murder Works!

Look! Barack Obama has directly ordered the murders of over a dozen people already. Thank goodness. Now I can rest easy, knowing I won't have to do it and feel bad, even if they are just some obscure brown mountain-dwellers half a world away.

And don't you feel better for it? Isn't your life positively swimming with atoms of joy that weren't there just a week and a half ago? Isn't your life at least 20 times better than it was before? Because that's the ratio of happiness-changing that occurred for the drone-bombed brown people half a world away: one life to zero. On, to off. Breathing and smiling and laughing and thinking, to fleshy compost. And they're dead. Completely. And they're not coming back. Ever.

They died because a man in a fancy office told other men with a fancy model airplane to drop some fancy bombs and scatter their bones across the mountainous landscape. Because he thought it was his job to kill people. Because he thought YOU hired him to kill people, even if you didn't. In the moment where the decision was "Do I drop bombs to kill people, or do I tell them to ground the drones and bury the bombs forever?" ...his decision was to continue the slaughter.

This is not change. I think it's disgusting that people call it that. This is just a different arm pulling the same bloody executioner's lever. Please stand with me and stop calling this whole mess noble.

This Is What Governments Do

If you can stomach the last half of this video, you are a grade-A, certifiable sociopath. This is what governments do:


(YouTube link)

Toward the end of watching this video, I was sobbing uncontrollably and wondered, "What the hell is wrong with me?" The answer came to my mind like a laser in the dark: "Not a thing. Not a single fucking thing." And I let myself feel it some more, because burying rage, hatred, and fear inside yourself doesn't make it go away, but only makes you a raging, hateful, and fearful person.

This is what governments do: They find a problem, point guns at people, and call it the final solution to that problem. "Want mail service? Give us your money. No seriously, [poke of gun in the ribs] give us your money." And then they write laws and point guns at anybody who tries to compete with their 'service.'

At least the mugger doesn't tell you it's for your own good. "I'm stealing this money to open a bakery for you to enjoy, you see?" Implicit is that you wanted a bakery to go to in the first place, and that theft is a moral way to build one.

This is what governments do: They grab your head and point your eyes at anything they can construe to be scary. They tell you you're completely powerless to fix the problem and that you need government for that purpose. While they're holding your head in position, the other slimy hand wriggles into your pocket and takes what it pleases. When you're no longer scared, they find something else to scare you with. The theft of taxation is their income, and FEAR is the product they supply in exchange. Packaged and delivered at no cost to the government by the mealy-mouthed publishers of the mainstream media.

At least a weasel doesn't try to tell the hen that he's right to steal her eggs.

This is what governments do: They start a war and call it necessary. Their sales pitch is identical to the one above. They kill foreign soldiers and call it necessary. They destroy cities and call it necessary. They ruin peoples' belief in human decency every day, and call it necessary. They murder children and call it necessary. Then they point at all that blood and guts and destruction--the pulsing, screaming, slopping mess of human misery left in the wake of the machines of war--and they say, "See? This is why we must control people. They're a wretched mess." They point at the results of their destruction, and call it sufficient cause for further destruction. Because we are wretched beings.

Fuck you. I am not a wretch. And neither is anybody I associate with. And neither were the million dead civilians in Iraq before they were blown up, shot, tortured, and left bleeding to death in the desert. And neither is anyone who hasn't been consistently and systematically beaten into submission. If you beat a dog every day for six thousand years, are you going to say it's within the dog's nature to be a cowering, whimpering, helpless mess?

This is what governments do: They beat people in worse ways than dogs could ever be beaten. You can only humiliate a dog so much, but the capacity for humiliation of humans is nearly infinite. The government tells you what you can and cannot eat. You're far too stupid to come up with a way of figuring that out on your own, or through cooperation with others. The government takes your money to save for your retirement. You can be such an idiot about that, sometimes. The government decides for you, what is moral and immoral. You're dumber than a bag of babbling idiots on the subject, and have no way to figure it out on your own. The more central control, the more the government is telling people that they're helpless, ignorant fools with no hope of running their own lives. Hardly anybody is actually as stupid as governments would have us think, but it's a highly effective model because it's inflicted on our formative brains from day one by families unwilling to break the cycle.

This is what governments do: They capitalize on child abuse. Only weak-willed people would submit to the humiliations of government voluntarily, gladly, patriotically. Only abused people become so weak-willed in the first place. Only sociopaths would capitalize on that abuse for personal gain. Only monsters would call the whole thing moral.

This is what governments do.

Facebook "Political Views" Liberated!

I didn't notice until just now, but back on March 5th, Facebook announced that they were opening up the "political views" field on user profiles to a free-form field. Previously there had only been a drop-down menu of limited choices, including various degrees of "liberal" and "conservative," along with "libertarian," and "apathetic," thrown in for good measure. As an anarcho-capitalist, I originally labeled myself as libertarian, but later simply chose to be unlisted for the category of "political views," in the name of accuracy.

Now it's wide open, so you can type in whatever you want. As you begin to type, it'll even auto-complete with other things people have typed in already. When I typed in "A-N-A-R-C-H-I-S-T," it gave up on me someplace halfway through the word, when it realized I wasn't trying to claim I was some sort of hyper-political 16th century Anabaptist. After making sure I had spelled it right, I clicked on my newly claimed political view only to find that there is nobody in any of my direct contacts or networks who has affiliated as an anarchist. How very sad.

So I thought I'd put out the word to anybody who, like I did, missed this update on Facebook and always wanted more options for that category. It's not exactly the end-all be-all of world wide web communications opportunities, but Facebook certainly has its place in my browsing habits. If any of you would like to friend me, please do and indicate that you know me because you're a reader of my blog. I'm always interested to learn more about my readers, and what sorts of great things they're getting up to.

Cure For Depression?

I wonder what the psychological community would think of this treatment method (or if something similar has already been tried) for depression: Watching videos of babies laughing. The one below is my favorite, but the related videos show that there are lots of babies out there with great laughs. I have marked some of them as "favorites" on my YouTube account. In the event that I have a bad day, I just watch the videos and laugh along. I'm not exactly your typical example of a major depressive, but it works for me when I'm feeling a little sad. I wonder if it would work for someone feeling a lot sad...

On Truth: The Tyranny of Illusion

Want a free groundbreaking book? Click here. Want to be king for a day, and dictate what one of my blog posts should be about? Read on.

For a short time, an influential new philosophy text is available in .pdf form for free! Stefan Molyneux, who is generally generous with his books in the first place, (he has a standing offer to give them away to people who simply can't afford them at the moment) has authorized the distribution of On Truth: The Tyranny of Illusion in a "give away like free philosophical candy" manner. On Truth... is no candy, though. For many it's a bitter philosophical pill which brings tough decisions to the forefront of their personal lives. It remains, however, written completely with the non-philosopher in mind. After all, philosophy actually supposed to help everybody, right?

It's already one of the most influential books in my life, and I just read it a few months ago. I would recommend it to anyone with an even remote interest in living a happier life. If you are literate in the English language (or in Dutch, apparently) you're doing yourself a disservice by passing this short read up (it's just 73 pages). For free! Really. Get it. It's right here for free, which means no money at all needs to be exchanged. Just click and look at the bottom of the page. I'll even sweeten the deal. If you read it and can somehow prove it to me (Ooooh! I smell book reports!) then I'll make a blog post on the topic of your choosing. Is that great, or what? You can even solicit a custom blog post topic if you have already read the book in the past. And no, I'm not out of topics. I actually have a back-log, but have just been busy for the past couple of weeks and haven't posted. Fret not, subscribers!

All this giving things away is catching on. Maybe after you get a free book and a free blog post on the topic of your choosing, you'll give away a free carrot cake to the next influential author, and the whole cycle will start over again as (s)he is inspired to do great things. All because of a carrot cake! That's highly unlikely, but you can see the idea, I'm sure. Below is the blurb for On Truth... You should read the book. Because it's free.

From a short-term, merely practical standpoint, you really do not want to read this book. This book will mess up your life, as you know it. This book will change every single one of your relationships - most importantly, your relationship with yourself. This book will change your life even if you never implement a single one of the proposals it contains. This book will change you even if you disagree with every single idea it puts forward. Even if you put it down right now, this book will have changed your life, because now you know that you are afraid of change.

This book is radioactive and painful - it is only incidentally the kind of radiation and pain that will cure you...

The Philoso-Physician

The internet's most popular philosophy podcast now has a brand spanking new tool to create customized podcast feeds tailored to your needs! Stefan Molyneux, host of Freedomain Radio, has put together a web-based wizard called the Philoso-Physician. It exists to "diagnose" your philosophical needs and desires through a short series of questions.

You can either choose to narrow your search in the Philoso-Physician through choosing from a series of questions or a series of categories. With each option you choose broad samples at first, and then are asked to narrow the field within each broad option you chose. And it's all check -boxes. Click, click, click, done. The best part (in my opinion) is that the final page not only shows you the results of your "check-up" with the Philoso-Physician with a short description and link to each podcast that fits your requests, but it also can e-mail you a link to a custom .xml feed for all of those podcasts. For those of you who don't speak geek, that means you can copy and paste the link into your favorite feed aggregator like iTunes or Juice, and it will automatically deliver your search results to that program for easy loading onto your music player. I seriously recommend you go give it a try, especially if you're curious about rationalist philosophy, but intimidated about where to start. There are over a thousand podcasts, videos, articles, and loads of other content at FDR, so there's plenty of source material to narrow from!

Remember to paste the link for the .xml file into your aggergator to get it to work right. (Feel totally free to e-mail me for help with this if you're unfamiliar with the programs or technologically inept. I love to explain stuff like this to anybody)

Edit: 3/14/08 2:07 p.m. - There is now a fancy little demo of this application, available here.

I Love and Want To Have Sex With The Flag of the United States of America

I love my country more than life itself, and you can't say anything to change my mind. You can tell me the president is an idiot, you can say the armed forces are a mindless killing machine, you can say democracy is just a suggestion box for slaves; none of it will derail me from my unwavering belief that America is right and good and backed by this world's one true Christian God. My proof? Our nation's most important symbol, the American Flag. Just look at it:


How can you want to look at anything else for the rest of your life? Really. I have my bedroom decorated with fifty-seven American Flags: one for each state, and one for each future state (Puerto Rico, Iraq, Syria, Iran, China, North Korea, and The Canadas). Such an enduring and empowering symbol is beyond comparison to anything else in the history of existence. Some would have the Constitution as our Great Godly Nation's most important symbol, but that's ridiculous. The Constitution and its values are changeable, and imminently flawable. The Flag, by contrast, is an unwavering symbol of our nation's solidarity and allegiance with everything that is right and holy. In God's heaven. On God's Earth. In God's brain. Because I know what's in God's brain, and it looks an awful lot like the good ol' stars-'n'-stripes!

When I'm stressed about world events and the problems people are causing for themselves, I just relax and imagine the American Flag waving in the sweet American breeze. It waves in a land free of dictators and theocrats who say, "If you're not for us, you're against us," or who try to censor free speech. It waves unobstructed by mortar explosions and bullets piercing the gaping flesh of dying children. It waves proud over an uncorrupt land and casts fear into the hearts of our enemies. Our Flag is ecstatic to fly over a land where Martial Law is something to look forward to in the event of a large-scale terrorist attack or disease outbreak. After all, how could Martial Law be a bad thing under any government guided by the rock-solid principles of the U.S. Flag?

Some days, I'm unable to attend work or social events because I'm so far in the throes of rapture produced by the Flag. I'm about to go to my local Flag quilting society, when I see the Flag at Perkins, and it just strikes me blind and renders my anal sphincter useless. You know you're truly American when the Flag has caused you to shit yourself. I then lay around in my filth and speak in tongues about the Flag.

I often masturbate when thinking about the Flag and its thirteen alternating stripes of red and white, and its field of fifty white stars on the blue background of God's sky. I wish I could form my own man cum stars on a blank blue background of a flag, but that would be disrespect according to US Code Title 4, Chapter 1 - The Flag, Section 3: "The flag should never be used as a receptacle for receiving, holding, carrying, or delivering anything." Sadly, it's illegal for the Flag to be my semen receptacle.

I think it's appropriate for the Flag to be protected by laws, and lots of 'em! Some say it violates our free expression to do so, but I think that free speech is obviously limited by what our God and government (and therefore Flag) deem acceptable. What other way could it be? And would God accept desecrating the highest symbol of the greatest nation in history, a nation that has endured as the best for almost 250 years?! I think not.

Our Flag strikes fear into the hearts of our enemies and inspires respect from our allies, who want nothing more than to be just like America. Any dissent *cough! France, cough!* is purely a result of jealousy. The French are just bitter that we've been a nation for longer than they have and that our democracy is the longest lasting one in history.

I feel that the Flag will ultimately bring world peace and we will all be one democratic nation, under the Flag and God. No other nation's flag is even remotely as awe-inspiring as ours. What more could the un-free infidels of the world want? Plus, they would be allowed into the inner sanctum of Flag appreciation, after they go through the citizenship process and become Americans legally. This would grant the whole world permission to have the same feelings I do for our Flag and all it stands for.

So don't come down on me about how George Bush is a liar war criminal who misled his people in the lead-up to an unjust war. First of all, any war under the Flag of the US of A is automatically a just one. It says so in the Bible, I think, though I haven't read much of it, so I'm not sure. Secondly, how could such a Godly man of such unmoveable moral character possibly mislead us? It's clear he is at the end of a spiritual conduit with God himself, and therefore also with the Flag. Has the Flag ever lied to you about a war before? That's what I thought.

The Flag, and God, and the president all know, just as well as I do, that there's no such thing as unjust war as long as the soldiers are wearing uniforms. It just so happens that the way you win a war is to put the American Flag on the uniform. That's why we've never lost! U-S-A! U-S-A!

If only the rest of the world had an understanding of our Flag like I do, it would be better off. People in Darfur are killing one another because they don't have an appropriate view of religion and the Christian God, and the Flag. It's a simple matter of a little thing called the First Commandment, "Thou shalt not kill!" If they were American Christians like me, they would know killing is wrong...except in a few very limited circumstances:

1) A just war fought under the American Flag (which, as I've said, is ANY war fought under the American Flag).
2) Death penalty in our American penal system.
3) Necessary political assassinations.
4) "Protection killings" of abortion doctors.
5) The dropping of two nuclear warheads on Japan in WWII, as well as the fire-bombings of Tokyo and 66 other cities, resulting in 720,000 combined Japanese deaths.
6) The necessary killing we did as Americans to eradicate the British in the revolutionary war. Hey! We were here first anyway, it's our country!
7) Death penalty for any actual or suspected terrorist, anarchist, atheist, libertarian, or dissenter (as if those words even mean different things).
8) Those who expire from old age or violent rape while in prison on even the slightest of drug charges.
9) Everyone who dies as a result of the U.S. government (and therefore the Flag) giving aid to foreign governments. (It's a lot, but it's worth it, and justified)
10) Any time a police officer or soldier needs to kill someone for whatever reason the deem necessary. It's a little known fact that simply wearing a uniform with the Flag on it actually absolves you of anything that would normally be considered morally wrong.
11) The Civil War. Those idiots tried to make a different flag. See how that one worked out?
12) Any other killing deemed appropriate by the government under God and the Flag.

As you can see, American attitudes toward killing are healthy and informed by the same Ten Commandments that should grace the doorways of each and every public establishment in the country. They're doing genocide in Darfur. GENOCIDE! We all know the US and its Flag won't stand for that. We were quick to respond to the European pleas for help in World War II because of all that genocide. The only reason Hitler had taken over the bulk of Europe and killed six million jews by the time we got there was because the Europeans were lazy and didn't have something like the American Flag to inspire them!

So the next time you question your government's authority, think of how silly you're acting! Any nation founded on such a fine symbol as the Flag could never go wrong, not even in a million years!